In the middle of the night.
You know how it is when you feel like something is squeezing your heart
And your face gets contorted
And before you knew what is happening
You feel tears streaming down?
My mind starts wondering.
I imagine how it would be like if I am one meanie,
Doing the unreasonable things like blowing my top,
Refusing to listen to explanations,
Insisting things to be my way
And so on.
I think of the consequences
MAybe I'll look like i'm not as meek and weak,
No retorts or arguments towards being bullied.
But I'll lose my friends.
Not that I have alot of friends for me to lose.
It's the form of loneliness.
When you feel like
Hey, it's time for you to be alone again.
It's been like this for so long I almost believe I've gotten used to it.
Almost.It's true that you don't need alot of good friends.
A handful is more than enough for anyone.
But it's times like this that i wish i have someone permanently there for me to depend upon.
That I know I at least have someone there no matter what.
Is that wishful thinking or what.
Change is the most constant thing in the world.
I guess so.
Keep reminding myself that and I'll feel better.
Yep.
I'm greedy.
I want more.
But I would never ever have it.
I must stay contented.
When would I ever have the chance to not make do anymore?
Can I don't go and get my results?
